Kenny Rogers' Twirl and Sing-A-Long

The Players:
(in Order of Appearance)
BOY: Brian
GIRL: Chrissie
KENNY ROGERS: A street performer wearing a veteran's hat, with white hair, beard, strums gee-tar, never breaks character.
TWIRLER: Man with a Vanilla-Ice/Eminem look with Interpretive dance skills (probably classically trained defined by those hand movements)
3 SWEDISH TEENS: Super Skinny Girl #1, Extra Skinny Guy #1, Emaciated Guy #2
CAMEOS: 2 Hasidic Jews, 3 Ghansta Asians, 1 black man

INT: EVENING. IT'S A GRIND COFFEE HOUSE
The Boy checks his iphone, and The Girl conducts a word search for the Greek meaning of "Perfect". There is an odd couple outside the window composes a song with a guitar and a flute. They speak of F flats and B sharps. The Boy finishes his iphone task and grabs the book that The Girl has in her hand to thumb through it.

GIRL: What?
BOY: Just checking to see how many pages you have left in the chapter.
GIRL: I can be done now.
BOY: Wanna take a walk?

EXT: EVENING. THE SANTA MONICA PROMENADE.
GIRL: What are you laughing at?
BOY: Well, I mean, in that candy store you managed to ask EVERY SINGLE QUESTION LISTED!
GIRL: Well.... I'm sorry but hello, I wasn't paying attention to any "cards" when there are dead candied insects right there distracting me! I mean, would you ever eat a chocolate covered cricket?
BOY: Depends. How much would I get paid?
GIRL: (reaching for the bag of candy) Pass me an espresso malt ball.

A Willie Nelson style rendition of the Patsy Cline song "CRAZY" catches their attention.

KENNY ROGERS:(crooning) Crazy... I'm crazy for feeling so lonely....
BOY: What have we got here...
KENNY ROGERS: I'm crazy, crazy for feeling so blue
BOY: I like this guy. (he pops a malt ball into his mouth and soaks in the local color)

An ASIAN man 4'11" crosses The Boy's path and stares longingly at his mug as he passes by. The Girl mad-dogs the small Asian man while clinging closely to the Boy's side, but the Asian is un-deterred and looks right past her with gaze set upon the Boy until he is out of their line of sight.

(Boy continues munching on candy without concern for the strange passer-by.)

KENNY: I knew you'd love me as long as you wanted
GIRL: That was so weird. Why was that Asian guy obsessed with you? What the heck--
BOY: Shrugs. Offers Girl another piece of candy.
KENNY: And then someday you'd leave me for somebody new

ENTER BEHIND Kenny, A TWIRLING MAN swoops around, down and to the front of Kenny, crosses stage Right, and pirouettes before landing a dip on a nearby light pole.

KENNY: Worry, why do I let myself worry?

The Twirler, takes his hand and covers his face, then his heart, and saunters over to his bike filled with stuffed animals where he takes a bear's head in his hand and sighs...

ENTER STAGE LEFT, the 3 SWEDISH TEENS pause at the sight of the twirler.

BOY: Look at his audience.
GIRL: LOOK AT THE DANCER!
BOY: The guy seems to know what he's doing... I mean he's actually kind of good.
The twirler sways into a triple lux.
GIRL: Maybe Classically trained?
Boy pops another malt ball into his mouth.
KENNY: Wond'ring what in the world did I do?

ENTER STAGE LEFT 2 HASIDIC JEWS cross STAGE RIGHT.
One is in a wheelchair (he's missing a leg) the other pushes gleefully his partner through the performance. The TWIRLER pirouettes a triple and bows a bit to the Jewish Men. They smile amused. The twirler, and Kenny is not.

KENNY: Crazy for thinking that my love could hold you

The Sweeds lose interest and pass up the fiasco in search of something to eat.
GIRL steals a peanut cluster, observing 3 GHANSTA ASIANS approaching from Stage Left.
BOY munches contently admiring the riffs and the pitch that Kenny displays.

BOY: I mean, the guy is GOOD.
GIRL: The dancer is too.
KENNY: I'm crazy for trying and crazy for crying

THE GHANSTA'S catch sight of the Twirler and snicker while a strange man diverts their attentions (approaches them from behind the Boy and Girl).

BOY: Did you hear that?
GIRL: No. I have been watching the twirling guy make out with his stuffed animals. LOOK at him!

The TWIRLER dips and plants a juicy wet on onto his GUND Polar Bear.

BOY: That guy came up to the Asians and asked them if they wanted weed...

CUT TO:
ASIANS: Na' Man.
PUSHER: You guys Chinese?
ASIANS: Na.
PUSHER: Do you know who Bruce Lee is?
ASIANS: Yeah man.
PUSHER: I like Bruce Lee. He was cool.

GIRL: Oh Shoot! I dropped my espresso ball.
BOY: Here.
GIRL: Seriously, Kenny Rogers is not even remotely phased by any of this, is he?
BOY: Nope. (and he pops in a yogurt covered pretzel)
GIRL: Here come the starving Sweeds back for more huh?

KENNY: And I'm crazy for loving you.
The Twirler does a 2-step with his luggage, and a spirit fingers finale.

Audience claps.
Kenny Rogers eyes drift towards the boy and the girl.

GIRL: Um... I think Kenny wants us to give him a buck.
BOY: I'm on it.
GIRL: Hey, ask him to play "The Gambler" next!

Lights out.