Being Parental

Today is my re-emergence into "normalcy" (as far as I am concerned).

For the past 5 days, I was caring for two infants (2yrs & 5mos.) and although I have known these kids since the day they were born, I didn't know what to expect from taking care of them for several days so their parents could enjoy a well deserved time of rest and relaxation away for their anniversary.

Now, sitting in front of my computer having "time" to answer emails and catch up on actual work duties and messages is a luxury. I am stretching out my biceps and shoulders after days and days of "heavy lifting" a toddler and a growing baby, and am trying to filter out the Sesame Street, Lion King, and Beauty and the Beast jingles I've been humming over and over with more current music on my ipod.

I "knew" motherhood was a demanding job. I didn't "know" for sure until this experience. I also didn't know that no matter how tired you are, how stressed, how burdened, how spent you are- that there is a reserve deep inside that always, always kicks in to keep you going when they need you. Even at 1am, and 3am, and 6:15am... when the kiddies voices come over the monitor and there is something that clicks on- a "fix-it" mode or a nurturing instinct that carries you through all the loss of sleep and "me time" into the next day and night. And although it was really hard at times when one was hungry and the other needed a diaper change, having that two year old come hug my legs for comfort, or crawl into my lap for a cuddle, rocking a tired baby to sleep and cooing with her on the floor as she makes new discoveries about what her body can do... was something that offered a glimpse of so many rewards that must come from being a parent along with the sacrifice.

It gave me a new appreciation for what Mothers go through on a daily basis, and a bigger appreciation for the Fathers that stay around and help. I couldn't IMAGINE how people raise children on their own, and I suddenly have so much respect for their triumph in that difficulty.

Fortunately, I had plenty of help every day from friends, family, and people who LOVE these kids.

Although I must admit, there was a side of me that felt overwhelmed by my novice in this role,
there was also a part of me that was amazed that I was able to troubleshoot and "fix" the tears and keep everyone relatively happy and healthy (for 5 days at least).

Being a mom was never one of those things I obsessed over. In fact, I remember babysitting throughout High School realizing I didn't really even LIKE kids! Now, I realize that kids are amazing complex little persons that bring joy along with trials that only God can really grant you the strength and wisdom and grace to raise well.

And you know, there is so much joy there after all. Joy along with a great sacrifice.

But maybe it's only a sacrifice because I am so used to all of my eyes on only me.

I have a deep appreciation, respect and amazement for Moms and Dads out there. I seriously, seriously do, and because of that truly hope that I can always be there to pitch in when you need a break or two!

As for me, it's still to fresh to think about having "my own". But I know that day will come, and there will be even bigger lessons to come with that.

God give me strength! :)